Dear Mother:
Please stop making me pose for ridiculous photographs. I refuse to give in to your silly notions that I have a brother or sister on the way. Don't think for a moment that I won't welcome it into this world by crapping all over the house as soon as you arrive from the hospital.
Sincerely, Agatha Helen
PS - Please serve my salmon warm next time. It tends to lose its flavor when served directly from the refrigerator.
1 comment:
Dear Aggie,
Normally, we don't bother with cats, but we feel we must write you. 3 years ago, our lives were turned upside down by a bundle of "joy." Our parents gave us all that crap about being "big sisters" too. It's a scam. We can't even tell you the last time they took us to McDonald's for cheeseburgers, just the 4 of us. We miss the good old days.
In addition to crapping everywhere in the house, might we also recommend chewing binkies, bottles, and baby toys? It promises to get you some attention from your parents.
Hang in there,
Harper and Abby Mayfield
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